The 90% Panic: Handing My Nearly-Finished Book to Friends

You’d think that getting a book to 90% done would feel dreamy. Triumphant. Like the moment in a film where the music swells and the heroine walks in slow motion, hair blowing, absolutely nailing life.

In reality, 90% done felt more like:

“Oh no. People might actually read this now.”

For months, it was just me, my note book, notes, laptop, and an unholy number of snacks. I could tinker forever. Add a line here, delete a paragraph there, rewrite a joke because it didn’t quite land. No one was watching. No one knew if I chickened out.

And then came the moment: I’d written all the chapters. I’d cried in all the appropriate places. I’d made myself chuckle more than once (peak narcissism). The book was basically… real.

Which meant I had to do the terrifying thing: send it to actual humans.

Choosing my “critics”

I picked a small group of pals who I knew would give me:

• Honesty

• Encouragement

• And ideally, only a tiny amount of emotional damage

They were a mix of:

• The friends who always have a book, podcast, entertainment recommendation

• The friends who know the whole messy backstory of my divorce and dating life

• The friends who pull zero punches but love me anyway

I created the group chat, sent the first message announcing the secret I'd been keeping for months and I hit send. I instantly regretted every life decision that had led me to this point.

The longest wait

While they were reading, my brain did laps:

• What if they hate it?

• What if it’s boring?

• What if I think it’s funny but it’s actually just mildly unhinged?

Every ping on my phone became either hope or dread.

And then… the messages started to come in.

“I’m on chapter three and I’ve snorted my coffee twice already.”

“I had to put it down because I was getting emotional in Costa.”

“This bit is so raw but so you, don’t you dare cut it.”

Sure, there were notes. A couple of bits that didn’t quite land. Spelling mistakes. Additional theme ideas where everyone agreed I needed to bare more. Tiny edits to tighten things up. But overall?

They saw me. They saw the book. And they still liked me after reading it. Miracle.

What their feedback did for me

It did three big things:

1. Confirmed it was worth finishing, it wasn’t just funny in my own head. Other people were genuinely reacting to it.

2. Made the book sharper. A few small changes made chapters clearer, punchier and more “me”.

3. Made it feel way less lonely. Writing can feel like shouting into a void. Hearing my friends’ reactions felt like someone shouting back, “We’re here! Keep going!”

By the time I’d gone through their comments, I wasn’t just at 90% any more. I’d crossed into that final 10%: the part where you stop hiding and start getting ready to share your heart with strangers.

And honestly? That might be the bravest bit.

If you’re curious what all the fuss was about, you can read the book that my mates bravely tore apart and lovingly put back together – Swipe Right, Keep Left is now available on Kindle.

And if you want my personal dating Rule Book freebie, you can grab that on my site too.